Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
farters have to be the big spoon...
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
