I want to walk on stilts...naked
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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