fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you would pick up someone in the library
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
