the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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