11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I'm too high and old for this...
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
