covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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