It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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