So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
