Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Randomize
