so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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