I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
