Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
my shit smells like andre
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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