Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
