I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Terrible idea I love it
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
