you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
