I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
