You work out of a Hotel?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize