So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
