What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
