I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
