Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
