if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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