shes about as inviting as chlamydia
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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