Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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