She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
