Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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