I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
