Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
