Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
