i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
