Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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