Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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