Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
