On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize