the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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