Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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