He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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