god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
