So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
