Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
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