dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
