I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
