that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
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