If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Ladies don't puke and tell
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
