piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
