"it" just moved
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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