at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
