you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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