And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize