i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
